Though ancient, the practice of mediation is enjoying significant contemporary popularity. But can meditation help with midlife and/or marital woes (the subject of this site)? »more»

We all want to be happy but how exactly does one go about becoming happy? »more»

“The most creative force in the world is a post-menopausal woman with zest.” ~ Margaret Mead Lost Your Zest? Get It Back! »more»

Just got back from my annual road trip. I don't think the details are interesting enough to post here but suffice to say that I continue to believe that multi-state, non-interstate road trips remain the quintessential summer American experience. »more»

Here’s the thing. Most of my features come from my Romanian roots. I’ve always liked having dark hair and blue eyes. I am most psyched that my “gray” hair is silver, some people will even pay for that! After all, Dracula was Romanian and by many accounts was a particularly handsome man-thing. »more»

As I've often written, midlife has little or nothing to do with age. It happens when it happens. It's a psycho-spiritual event, a transformation from adult to maturity, from self-confidence to serenity. The demarcation area (midlife) can be identified by one overwhelming feeling: fear. Even more specifically, it's a fear of 'losing it' (whatever 'it' may be). You don't even have to be able to identify what 'it' is: all you need to recognize the midlife transition is to experience the fear of losing it. Dealing effectively with that fear takes you to maturity; failing to address it leads you to midlife crisis. So, how can you deal effectively with what is very often a nameless fear? All you need to acquire (and, incidentally, this constitutes the essence of the spiritual transition) is a deeper self-knowledge. You don't really 'need' anything . . . you have everything you require.

Want some help? Here's a little exercise that I've put together for you to help you to work through this transition. The instructions are simple: a) Write down your answers; b) Do not read beyond this paragraph until you're finished with the exercise;. c) Work through each of the three phases of the exercise in order. That's it! It should take you approximately a half-hour to complete the exercise. Ready to begin?

1. Complete this sentence "I am a _____________" as many times as you can, each time filling in the blank with a different word or phrase (a minimum of 20 times).
2. For each of the statements you wrote down in phase 1, re-write each statement with at least 5 different descriptors (for example: "I am a married [descriptor] man [word or phrase from phase 1]."
3. For each descriptor-word (or phrase) set, circle the ones that are virtually impossible to change (for example: your height, your IQ, your sexual identity). Make sure that you only circle the impossible characteristics, not the merely difficult.

When you've completed your list and circled the appropriate characteristics, only then read on.

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No, it's not a misspelling (and yes, I do make frequent use of my spell-checker). As our agrarian past fades from our collective memory, so will the images of pastoral scenes, farm implements, and, yes, even stiles. I even had some trouble finding a decent photo of one (and this one's from England, where the rural life still survives). What made me think of a 'stile' (a ladder providing access over a fence or wall) today was an interview I had last night with Rabbi Ed Weinsberg. Ed faced and overcame the challenges of prostate cancer just a very few years ago, and he's written a book that documents his story (and others) for the benefit of the 1/6 of all men who'll be facing that disease. For Ed, the experience catapulted him to a higher appreciation of faith, love, and even sex.

It's a fact of the human condition: transitions never come easily. They always appear as an interruption in the kind of life we desire and even plan for: a life of security, tranquility, ease, and peace. Yet, as I've written fairly often, the so-called 'interruption' is the reality, the sense of security is the illusion. Our 'common sense' lies to us, and tries to convince us that these disruptive events that come hurtling like projectiles into our lives are obstacles to our happiness and progress. Obstacles? Or, are they, in fact, the steps that take us up and over the obstacles? I submit to you that, just perhaps, these disruptions — even the big and painful ones — are what stimulate change and growth and that, without them, we'd face stagnation and decay. "No pain, no gain" is true particularly because every change involves a painful separation from our status quo.

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Recently, from a business, personal, and spiritual perspective, I've been doing a lot of meditating on [apparent] failure. Right now, I can't think of a more apropos topic for people facing and experiencing the midlife transition. For one thing, your successes don't precipitate a midlife crisis. In fact, an uninterrupted string of successes can actually insulate you from undergoing the midlife transition, leaving you for longer than expected — and longer than necessary — state of im-maturity. When you're 'blessed' with success, you may be getting what you want, but to your own detriment: not getting what you really need.

I ardently agree with Friedrich Nietzsche that "What does not kill me, makes me stronger." The contrary, may very well also be true: What pampers me, makes me weaker. Getting your own way may, for a time, seem like a triumph; but, is it really? Does it actually move you forward, or does it, more often than not, lead you further into imminent trouble? Do negative consequences hold you back in fact, or are they, rather, 'medicinal blessings'?

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Almost everyday we hear somebody say “I live vicariously through you” or “ I wish we could do what you’re doing.” As inviting as it may seem, it’s probably not the lifestyle for everybody. There is actually quite a commitment to chucking it all and becoming a gypsy. »more»

I have a question for which I have NO idea how to find the answer. »more»

It seemed like a good idea at the time. (But then again, I’m sure I said the same thing when I was sunk all that money into my fancy Betamax tape system.) After several months as a member of the Cult of Facebook, I started to have some concerns about the level of personal information I was putting out there for public consumption. »more»

For those who have discovered that happiness does not come from ambition or acquisition, but is found in those moments when you are concerned with neither, Jamie Jensen’s Road Trip USA is the perfect reference work. A good road trip extracts you from the numbness of everyday life, reigniting your sensitivity to the world around you. »more»

It’s Mother’s Day. This one is a milestone for me. It’s my first without chicks in the nest. I’d received phone calls from all three of my children -- the fast-walking, subway-chasing, black-wearing, taxi-flagging NYC urbanite daughters, 24 & 22, and The Boy, 18, sending their love and best wishes. »more»

I don't know how to approach this whole question, but I know I have to put my best possible foot forward and make positive change, not negative, because I don't have the right to thoughtlessly crash my way through this. I love everyone involved. Furthermore, I believe that the way I treat others is the proof of who I am. I want to prove I can change in a mature way. »more»

For many, thinking of summer, of freedom and adventure, conjures up going on a "road trip." With good reason, road trips can be all that and more. Speaking from experience I can tell you that the best road trip moments are often found far away from the Interstate and that the best way to find these is a good travel guide book. »more»