One of the things that can be drummed out us as we age is our ability to dream. When we were younger they came so easily. Somewhere along the way this ability, those delicious ever changing desires, ambitions and dreams become so deeply buried we seem to be unable to find them. Where did they go? »more»

That is the cry of the "innocent victim" . . . most often followed by, "After all I've done for you!" Does this sound at all familiar? »more»

If you haven't yet noticed my attraction to silly things, let me now bring it to your attention. I discovered a long time ago that, very often, silly things contain far more wisdom than sensible things. It's one of the great ironies of our universe. Take, for example, that incredibly silly series of books by Douglas Adams that goes by the title The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. There's enough silliness (and, consequently, wisdom) in those pages to last a person the better part of a lifetime. Take, for example, the excerpt from the Guide that appears in the third book of the trilogy (Life, The Universe, and Everything) under the heading "RECREATIONAL IMPOSSIBILITIES." According to Adams, the Guide says this about flying: "There is an art, . . . or, rather, a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."* »more»

We spend January 1 walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives... not looking for flaws, but for potential. - Ellen Goodman »more»

There may be no more perfect book for the LifeTwo audience than Gretchen Rubin's new book "The Happiness Project". Rubin spent a year as a one person focus group testing every possible way to increase personal happiness. Part memoir and part "how to fix your life", "The Happiness Project" is a joy to read. »more»

The more I step into this place of being open about early midlife celebrations, the more women I've noticed coming forward with their stories of frustration and loss. And when I say "loss", what I'm hearing more and more is that they've lost sight of who they are and are frustrated about who they've become. »more»

You can usually spot a creative person because they seem lost and confused or doing too many things at once. Time management simply bedevils creative types. Whether it’s keeping focused on projects or just getting the stuff of life done, a bubbling cauldron of chaos is usually close at hand. »more»

Though ancient, the practice of mediation is enjoying significant contemporary popularity. But can meditation help with midlife and/or marital woes (the subject of this site)? »more»

When you wake up in the morning what’s the first thing you think? Is it: “What a glorious day, I can’t wait to get up and see what this day brings.” How about at the end of the day? Are you smiling, feeling creative and energized? If not, do you think your attitude would be better if you thought more positively? »more»

As I've often written, midlife has little or nothing to do with age. It happens when it happens. It's a psycho-spiritual event, a transformation from adult to maturity, from self-confidence to serenity. The demarcation area (midlife) can be identified by one overwhelming feeling: fear. Even more specifically, it's a fear of 'losing it' (whatever 'it' may be). You don't even have to be able to identify what 'it' is: all you need to recognize the midlife transition is to experience the fear of losing it. Dealing effectively with that fear takes you to maturity; failing to address it leads you to midlife crisis. So, how can you deal effectively with what is very often a nameless fear? All you need to acquire (and, incidentally, this constitutes the essence of the spiritual transition) is a deeper self-knowledge. You don't really 'need' anything . . . you have everything you require.

Want some help? Here's a little exercise that I've put together for you to help you to work through this transition. The instructions are simple: a) Write down your answers; b) Do not read beyond this paragraph until you're finished with the exercise;. c) Work through each of the three phases of the exercise in order. That's it! It should take you approximately a half-hour to complete the exercise. Ready to begin?

1. Complete this sentence "I am a _____________" as many times as you can, each time filling in the blank with a different word or phrase (a minimum of 20 times).
2. For each of the statements you wrote down in phase 1, re-write each statement with at least 5 different descriptors (for example: "I am a married [descriptor] man [word or phrase from phase 1]."
3. For each descriptor-word (or phrase) set, circle the ones that are virtually impossible to change (for example: your height, your IQ, your sexual identity). Make sure that you only circle the impossible characteristics, not the merely difficult.

When you've completed your list and circled the appropriate characteristics, only then read on.

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