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Is a divorce better than an unhappy marriage? Research suggests an unexpected answer: there is "no evidence that unhappily married adults who divorced were typically any happier than unhappily married people who stayed married." And many unhappy marriages can be turned around. »more»
Much ado this week about David Letterman's forced acknowledgment of his affair with his assistant Stephanie Birkitt. According to research reported in a recent Newsweek story they are far from alone in engaging in an office romance: »more»
Submitted by Wesley on September 17, 2009 - 5:46pm.
While we joke about mother-in-laws, it is a complex relationship filled with conflict potential. Since understanding a problem is the first step to solving it, having a book like Terri Apter's "What Do You Want from Me?: Learning to Get Along with In-Laws" is a good starting point. »more»
Submitted by hlesbrown on August 9, 2009 - 11:52am.
No, it's not a misspelling (and yes, I do make frequent use of my spell-checker). As our agrarian past fades from our collective memory, so will the images of pastoral scenes, farm implements, and, yes, even stiles. I even had some trouble finding a decent photo of one (and this one's from England, where the rural life still survives). What made me think of a 'stile' (a ladder providing access over a fence or wall) today was an interview I had last night with Rabbi Ed Weinsberg. Ed faced and overcame the challenges of prostate cancer just a very few years ago, and he's written a book that documents his story (and others) for the benefit of the 1/6 of all men who'll be facing that disease. For Ed, the experience catapulted him to a higher appreciation of faith, love, and even sex.
It's a fact of the human condition: transitions never come easily. They always appear as an interruption in the kind of life we desire and even plan for: a life of security, tranquility, ease, and peace. Yet, as I've written fairly often, the so-called 'interruption' is the reality, the sense of security is the illusion. Our 'common sense' lies to us, and tries to convince us that these disruptive events that come hurtling like projectiles into our lives are obstacles to our happiness and progress. Obstacles? Or, are they, in fact, the steps that take us up and over the obstacles? I submit to you that, just perhaps, these disruptions — even the big and painful ones — are what stimulate change and growth and that, without them, we'd face stagnation and decay. "No pain, no gain" is true particularly because every change involves a painful separation from our status quo.
Submitted by Laurie Israel on August 6, 2009 - 8:46am.
Like many of you other mediators out there, I am always very pained to read accounts of our celebrity brethren who are struggling with their marriages. The media is insistent. The klieg lights focused on these people in distress are glaring. They are experiencing their own personal marital problems, but under a microscope of public view. »more»
Sandra Tsing Loh is a demi-celebrity among Los Angeles's NPR-listening classes. The onetime performance artist turned author and radio commentator either amuses or annoys. Now her piece in the July Atlantic -- which uses her affair and forthcoming divorce as the stepping-off point for a sweeping attack on modern marriage -- has, for many, gone way past annoying and into anger at her analysis -- and at Loh herself. »more»
My MLC got me searching for the deeper meanings of life. I'm putting this construct forth as my opinion because it might not look meaningful to you but I think it might help some people.
Why does a spouse cheat? Why do we want to find lovers in real life or online, and get that excitement? Why do we worry and fret about aging? All of this when we know better. »more»
Submitted by MitchTemple on June 24, 2009 - 9:57pm.
1.) The Marriage Turnaround takes the angle that believing myths in marriage are responsible for many problems. What is the behind most destructive marriage “myths” that many couples believe?
Bad thinking! In other words, inaccurate beliefs, expectations and attitudes. »more»
This is one of the most haunting songs I've ever heard. This song has to be about MLC, depression, divorce, etc. It starts with a male voice on the left and the female voice on the right. After the crosses, the sides switch.
"For millions of years mankind lived just like the animals.
Then something happenend which unleashed the power of our imagination. »more»
I had never heard the term "emotional affair" before I stumbled over it in an online article about a month ago. When I read the column, I sat at my computer in numb recognition, followed by a sense of grief and horror. I was in one and I hadn't realized what it was or how dangerous and painful it was going to be. »more»
There are many books on how to improve one's marriage or what to do if the union is over. However there aren't so many that take a completely macro-view of marriage as an institution. That's exactly what "The Marriage-Go-Round: The State of Marriage and the Family in America Today" by Andrew J. Cherlin is all about.
"Mom, I'm getting married!" What mother doesn't get weak knees at the thought of hearing those words? After the rush of excitement and joy come so many questions and tasks from the florist to the caterer. So many in fact that it's easy for the mother of the bride (or groom) to forget it's their big day too and who can blame them for wanting to look absolutely gorgeous as well? »more»
I don't know how to approach this whole question, but I know I have to put my best possible foot forward and make positive change, not negative, because I don't have the right to thoughtlessly crash my way through this. I love everyone involved. Furthermore, I believe that the way I treat others is the proof of who I am. I want to prove I can change in a mature way. »more»