Going to Our Center by Ellen Besso, Life Coach & Group Facilitator for MidLife Women

Slowing down, going within, centering, getting in touch with ourselves…We hear this message often and are told this will improve our quality of life. It’s simple, yet profound. It’s tough to do because of the busyness of our lives and the busyness of our brains.

I invite you to take a deep, slow breath, sit back, and enjoy the stillness:

“What if you knew that the impulse to move in a way that creates beauty in the world will arise from deep within and guide you every time you simply pay attention and wait?” Dr. Toni Lamotta

“If you feel dismayed and frustrated, it may be desirable to pause…and realize that it is your web of physical drama that is causing all of it. Become quiet and removed from the drama. Step outside the hurricane carousel of events. Once you have paused it will be easier to identify the root of the problem.” April Crawford

“Moving inward to our center clarifies the confusion of midlife.” Ellen Besso

“One conscious breath, (2 or 3 is even better), taken many times a day, is an excellent way of bringing space into your life.” Eckhart Tolle

Lately I have been thinking about centering a lot. The maze of midlife can be very challenging to navigate as so much is transforming within us. The circuitry rewiring that’s taking place affects every system in our bodies. It doesn’t stop at changes in menstrual cycles, low energy, energy surges, passionate, strong emotions, or changes in sleep patterns. Our very spirit is affected.

I’ve written often about my philosophy of midlife – that it is the internal journey that is the important one – not the outward manifestations of change. (Although I don’t deny that the outward complexities can certainly be challenging). The journey that begins roughly in our late 30’s does not stop when we become menopausal. We are different and our priorities reflect that.

When we are experiencing uncertainty and perhaps even chaos in any or all parts of our lives, there’s really nowhere to go but inward, toward our center…toward that part of us where stillness lies. We can picture our center as an actual place if that makes it easier. Years ago in a guided visualization we were asked to envision in great detail an idyllic room or scene that dwelt inside us. As I recall it was in our head, although it could be in our heart or any other area we desire.

Eckhart Tolle offers a simple suggestion for moving our attention from our usual external emphasis to an internal one. He invites us to bring our attention first to our hands, and feel the energy in them. Then to do the same with our feet, then with other parts of our body. In this way we feel the aliveness that lives inside us. This is our spirit.

Another way to center is by using a Budhist smiling meditation. We start by sitting in meditative pose with a smile on our faces. We continue to imagine other parts of our body smiling, until even our liver smiles. This brings a connection with our center, and with it joy.

I believe that the key to centering lies in slowing ourselves down. Breathing deeply has that effect. Even one deep breath can bring us to the place where stillness lies. Having the desire, some simple tools, and the commitment to go towards our center on a regular basis changes the quality of our lives. It also helps everyone else on the planet.

As a Life Coach and Group Facilitator, Ellen Besso inspires and guides MidLife Women as they navigate the maze of midlife to find joy & fullness in their lives.

www.ellenbesso.com/midlifemaze