The Woman Who Cut Her Husband's Head Off - And Other Urban Myths About The Perimenopausal Woman

I heard it over 30 years ago so I might be getting some of the finer points wrong but I think it goes something like this.

A husband comes home after a long day at work and finds his dinner on the table. He takes a bite or two then pushes his plate away, complaining to his wife that it's not to his liking.

The wife leaves the dining room, goes to the kitchen and returns with a large knife. She proceeds to cut her husband's head off.

Neighbours, alerted by the raucous, call the police who cart the wife away. Her only defence? "I'm in menopause and he bugged the heck out of me."

Did this incident really take place? I do not know.

Did I make this story up? Nope.

I overheard it one night listening to my mom talking to one of her friends on the phone. Mom was 50 at the time and like women before and since, they were trying to make sense of their world and the changes happening to their bodies by swapping stories with each other.

My mom had first heard the story from our grocer's wife. And I'm sure there was some small comfort in knowing that no matter how moody she got, at least she wasn't cutting Dad's head off. You go mom.

The story ranks up there with some of the great urban myths of our time.

You've heard them. Like the alligator that swam through the sewer system and showed up in someones toilet. Or the immigrant family who planted a vegetable garden in the living room of their apartment. They ate well until the weight from the soil and constant watering made the floor cave in on the apartment below.

This one happens to be about women and menopause and their very wicked mood swings. But it gets me thinking about the other myths and falsehoods we hold about midlife women. Some examples?

Midlife Women Are Boring
I think this one was started by some 30-something tart with an axe to grind. You know this isn't true. In fact, we're finally starting to get interesting.

Midlife Women Are Invisible
This one is partly true. You don't typically see us gracing magazine covers, starring in sit-coms or participating in extreme sporting events. We're too smart for that. We're holed up inside somewhere, laughing our heads off over a good bottle of wine with friends. As one colleague puts it, "The 40s are fabulous and those 50 year old's? They're having a hoot!"

Midlife Women Don't Enjoy Sex
I won't even comment on that one.

The list goes on and I'm sure you could come up with a story or two of your own. But suffice it to say that life is indeed good in the middle years, despite what you may hear.

Now, if you'll excuse me I have to finish cooking my husband his dinner. I'm trying a new recipe and he had better like it.

For more about the minutia of midlife- www.thebestkeptsecret.ca