The morally superior cheater; a Trappist monk's affair

Speaking in her blog about the writer Thomas Merton, who had been a Trappist monk in his twenties, Happiness-Project's Gretchen Rubin shares her surprise to have learned that he had an ongoing affair during the time he was a monk.

Here was a man who was world-famous, during his life, for his dedication to his vows of chastity, obedience, and poverty, and for his devout religious beliefs. I wasn’t shocked, but I was surprised.

Gretchen then points us to a LiveScience article on the surprising relationship between moral superiority and unethical acts such as infidelity. The article notes that people who view themselves as morally superior can have the ability to rationalize immoral activities by focusing on the outcomes they expect to occur (for example rationalizing cheating on a test as a way of achieving their dream of becoming a doctor and helping people). The article further noted that a new study published in the November issue of the Journal of Applied Psychology researchers find that the worst of cheaters can be the same people who think of themselves as having the highest moral standards. If they see their place in the world as doing great good, then doing a few things not-so-good along the way isn't such a big deal.

This is not to say that all people with self-described high morals are cheaters but it does help explain the Jim Bakkers and Ted Haggards of the world.

Gretchen's reason for bringing this up was the dangers of pride. Our reason for citing it is in the difficulty of learning to trust others after being burned. If you've been let down by a partner (especially infidelity), the ability to ever trust them (or anyone else) is one of the more difficult things to accomplish. That's the real crime of the high-minded, do-gooders who fall so hard and so publicly. They send the message that if the high-minded are cheating then everyone lower than them on the moral totem pole must be doing it as well. Oddly however the truth might be exactly the opposite.