Why positive psychologists say it's good to be grateful

Mother was right, you should always say "thank you." She was probably thinking about manners and politeness but there are also tangible benefits for doing so. According to positive psychology researchers gratitude helps you accomplish your goals.

Syndicated columnist David Pollay explains exactly how in a recent article in "Positive Psychology News Daily":

Look to the people who have already helped you. Thank each one personally and privately. Tell them why they are important to you and how they helped you succeed in the past. Let these people know how valuable they are to you. If you feel that you’ve thanked someone before, consider doing it again in an even more meaningful way.

It turns out that the people who have helped you in the past are the ones that are likely to help you again in the future. That is unless you didn't treat them properly the last time they helped you. How do you treat someone properly? By making sure to acknowledge what they did for you.

The second way that gratitude helps you with your goals is by attracting new people to support your efforts. You do this by thinking who else can help you and how you can repay them in advance. According to Pollay, "Your commitment to helping them will demonstrate two things: You care about what they care about, and you appreciate the role they could play in your life. Your new contacts will be grateful to you. And we know what happens when people feel gratitude."

Beyond just achieving goals, being grateful is likely to lead to higher personal satisfaction. From Pollay's post:

Gratitude researcher Robert Emmons recently reviewed the growing evidence that feelings of gratitude improve the quality of our lives. In one study he found that people who “wrote up to five things for which they were grateful or thankful” on a weekly basis “exercised more regularly, reported fewer physical symptoms, felt better about their lives as a whole, and were more optimistic about the upcoming week.” Positive Psychology co-founder Martin Seligman of the University of Pennsylvania, and his colleagues also discovered that when people took a few minutes each evening to write down “three good things” that happened to them during the day, their happiness increased and their depressive symptoms decreased.

So whether because you subscribe to the belief that you want to "do unto others..." or just because your mother taught you to be polite, the expression of gratitude is a very good trait to maintain.