How to navigate your midlife crisis

Do you feel really lost in your life? Are you in a midlife crisis and don't have a clue what to do about it? I know it can feel like you have stepped into a big mud puddle. The more you struggle to get out of it the greater the feeling of stuckness. Pull too hard and you step right out of your shoe.

You might have read that a midlife crisis is a kind of second passage in life. Like adolescence, its a period of transition. And you might have read some of my articles that also suggests that the 'crisis' in midlife crisis comes from our attempts to ignore, distract or numb the discomfort of the Disquiet or unease in our lives.

The idea is that the restlessness and suffering are signals that something is out of whack in your life. What you are doing and how you are living are no longer lining up with your deepest values, desires or calling.

Ignoring these signals is like ignoring a tooth ache. The pain from your tooth is a warning that something is wrong. Ignoring it or killing the pain does not make the decay or infection go away - in fact it will only get worse.

OK, so say you buy into the wisdom that suggests you need to engage your Disquiet or unease. You now know you need to pay attention and learn the messages underneath your midlife crisis. But how????? How do you tap into what you need to learn so you can get a sense of direction and actions you can take to live your life fully?

That is the zillion dollar question. That has launched many people on spiritual journeys, therapy, new adventures, self study, and personal development. Their success is dependent on several things, but one key is they need to learn how to create an internal navigation system.

This is hard to do alone. We need help in learning how to stop, get quiet and listen to the messages in the deepest part of ourselves. That is not something most of us know how to do. Here are the steps:

1. The first thing is to become still and get quiet. Meditation is a great way to do this.

2. Next, you want to ask yourself the kinds of questions that lead to discovery. The kind that 'peel the onion' to get to your deepest wisdom.

3. Then, in that quiet space, you listen. For what? That is really individual. For some its a quiet voice. For others, an image, phrase or feeling. You have to learn how the 'essential self' speaks. Ever had a strong gut instinct about something? And it 'spoke' to you in a way that you absolutely trusted?

4. Practicing this regularly and capturing what you are learning by writing about it will quickly develop data that you can analyze for themes and discoveries.

Want some help in doing this? I am offering a free program called "Unlocking your Disquiet". When you sign up, you receive a coaching practice each day for 6 days that will lead you through these steps in an easy and interesting way to unearth and unpack what you need to learn to navigate your Disquiet. If you are interested, you can learn more and sign up without any obligation by clicking here.

If you want to try this on your own, let me know how it goes and if you need any help. I recommend you use a notebook or journal to record your discoveries. I believe you will find this an interesting and valuable experience. Many of my coaching clients have experienced a real clearing away of some old stuff that was preventing them from seeing their way forward.

Good luck!