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Getting Naked With Him the First Time

Dating Goddess's picture

"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful." --Robert De Niro

Many mid-life singles haven't been intimate with someone other than their long-term mate for a long time. A common concern is that your body is not the same as it was when you were younger. You have what Bridget Jones called "jiggly bits." So the prospect of getting undressed with someone is unnerving. So much so, that it may prevent you from putting your toe in the dating pool.

Hopefully, you don't choose to become intimate with someone until you have dated him for a while. At that point, it is really a moot point because he will have seen you in different attire so knows your body's pros and cons and will love you for you, and not focus on your less-than-perfect body parts. As one male pal put it, "When you're naked we know we're going to get sex, so we don't focus on any imperfection. We're just very happy!"

My first post-marriage naked experience was with a man I'd been dating for a while. He was 100 pounds overweight so I had little concern he'd judge my larger-than-normal bumps and curves. I was right. In fact, I learned that some men love women who are, as one friend put it, "umpa lumpa."

If a man criticizes you when you are unclothed, that is a good sign he is not the right man for you. Even if you are not happy with your body, he should have the good sense to shut up, even if you are complaining about your stretch marks, cellulite, chubby thighs, etc.
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Got a topic on dating after 40 you want Dating Goddess to address? Send your issue to Goddess@DatingGoddess.com. Read her other articles at http://www.DatingGoddess.com.

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