A Clear-Eyed Look At Midlife Crisis

An article in Portland newspaper The Oregonian supports LifeTwo's approach to midlife crisis. In "Stumbling in midlife needn't lead to a major fall," reporter Patrick O'Neill talks to several counselors and academics and summarizes their take: "as men age, they trip on stumbling blocks that can cause stress, anger and fear."

But -- as we so often emphasize -- O'Neill's experts told him:

• crises in midlife do not affect all -- or even the majority -- of men;
• for many it is simply a time of assessment and adjustment;
• but for some, it is a psychologically traumatic event.

O'Neill doesn't mention the principal factor that makes midlife crisis pervasive in pop culture: confusing crises that happen in midlife with midlife crisis. Divorce, death, or job loss can be damaging whenever part of life they occur in -- but when they happen in midlife, they get lumped in to "midlife crisis."

For most people, questioning where they are in life is part of getting older, and it may be uncomfortable. "I have friends in (their) 70s who tell me this aging business is really hard, it's not for wimps," Glenn E. Good, editor of the New Handbook of Psychotherapy and Counseling with Men, told O'Neill.

O'Neill's sources advised reflection, preparation, and talking to spouse, friends, and family.

For more, visit our Midlife Crisis section and especially our Twenty Questions About Midlife Crisis.