It's been one month short of two years. My wife left and said some mean things. I took my lumps. Leaned on friends and my faith. I made it a point to recognize small blessings. I kept a journal in which I wrote 5 things to be grateful for - my gratitude book. Some days all I had to be grateful for was the fact that I had made it through the night. I celebrated small things - a good night with our little girl, a compliment from my boss, a friend who called to say "what's up."

There was a point where so many things were going bad at once and I could not fix them. All I could do was surrender. Once I did it took a load off. Things are straigthening out now. I believe that my wife walking out on me was something that was meant to happen.

People and relationsuips should be growing all the time. With her gone I am growing. Things are on a smaller scale - an apartment as opposed to a house, one income, tighter budget - but there's more freedom. We have the basics- which is enough for us to live simply, which is what I want my daughter to learn anyway.

We take car trips to interestting places - mini adventures. We do quirky things. She sees her dad really trying - the rock in this crisis. My wife is a semi-ok mom but she's more devoted to her dysfunctional friends who have moved into her life. Her choice.

This all happened when we were both in our mid-40's. We both had opposite responses to mlc. I recognized that there was some internal work that needed to get done, briefly saw a therapist and worked things out in my head. My wife fell in with a nest of creeps and had affairs.

If you're a healthy, wise and seasoned person then these could be your peak years. My wife's mlc changed my way of thinking - and living - for the better. Things are happening - a raise, my kid's excellent grades, university teaching job in addition to my regular work, free time to do volunteer work, a closer walk in my faith.

I don't miss my wife because obviously we were not meant to stay married together. I don't hate her but I would not mind never seeing her again. We had a daughter out of love so I'm grateful for that.

This is an excellent topic. I recovered by knowing and talking to people who had gone through this and come out on the other side okay.