ok we have been married for a little over 8 years and in that 8 years he has bounced from one job to the other or not had one at all. we have 4 little girls. He started working at his current job almost 2 years ago which is the longest he has ever worked in one place. Recently he told me he didn't know if he was in love with me anymore. He suddenly desided he wasn't a mini van
type but we have four kids I don't think anyone is a minivan type but when you have that many kids you don't have much of a choice. He says he feels lost, like he just woke up and this is his life. He says he doesn't know who he is as a person outside of being married and having 4 kids. He says he feels like we have been having marriage problems for a long time now and the thing is I don't see it. We have had a problem latley see there is this girl that has been working with him for 11 months now and the whole time he would come home and tell me the things she was saying about herself or to him. She is very open booked person and has a habbit of telling him very pirivate things about her and the conversations that they were having were wrong. She told him about her grooming habits down there tells him she is misserable in her marriage and whats wierd is that it seems like he created marriage problems for us so he had something to talk to her about. He told me a while ago that she starts the conversations and then last night he said he starts the conversation. He is balding very early and says he just wants her or any girl to find him attractive. He says he doesn't feel attractive anymore even though I tell he is all the time. WE are going to marriage theraphy starting on tuesday. I am very much in love with my husband I really don't want split up. I don't know if this is a midlife crisis depression or what I am just very scared and hurt right now and I really need some advice.