I have been married for 14yrs this date and as an ultimate procrastinator, I too, am working on my 2006 business taxes. My procrastination habits worsened after two failed spine surgeries 4 yrs ago and I became chronically disabled.
Since then, my husband has grown increasingly angry that I can no longer work, make 1/3 the income I used to, and "lay about all day". He is 5 yrs younger than me at 40yrs. Since I stopped working, he no longer recognizes my birthdays (forgets to buy me a card or present). My 76yr old father even brings me flowers for my birthday. Husband admitted that he thought I would have the surgery and be back at work.

Today is our anniversary and I said, "could we do something for our anniversary this weekend? - go out to dinner, etc" and he just rolled his eyes at me.
Husband barely talks to me (except after I make him dinner).

If I try to talk to him about a book that interests me, he just cuts me off and says he's not interested. He does have a demanding job, works long hours, and then either glues himself to the tv or games on his computer.
Husband either says very little or yells at me "to finish the G-d-m taxes" or "get xyz done now!" Husband relies on his long-time truck driver friend for advice and then harangues me because "someone said..I should...". (his friend never married, no girlfriend for past 12 years).

One male friend suggested that because I have a graduate degree and husband has his GED, husband isn't able to articulate his emotions as I would expect and not to take things literally.

However, I am so desperately sad because he has started treating me like crap since I became ill. I see a therapist and many doctors. He has refused marriage counseling.

Husband's mother has been morbidly obese all his life, in a wheelchair, and because he was embarassed by his mother all his life, I suspect that he sees me as another embarassment.
Also, I suspect that Husband is angry because he is contributing 75% of the income vice before it was 50-50. He has a bad temper and yells a lot.

I still love him and am scared to leave.
Does anyone see him changing his attitude if I were to have the 3rd surgery and hope for improvement?
Or should I just face that he cannot handle having a disabled wife and move on with my life?