I just came across this site while looking for someone, anyone who was single, childless and questioning. I'm 53 and have been married twice. Once at 19 (for 5 years) and again at 37 (for 4 years). I knew at a young age (13 or so)that I didn't want kids but now wonder why. Was it because I grew up as one of eight kids and saw what that was like for mom? The amount of sacrifice that was required. I have always been fiercely independent and have never felt I could depend on anyone else for anything. I've been called selfish by more than one person for not complying with society and procreating. At 41 I gave up the fight as far as relationships were concerned and figured since I'd spent so much of my life alone that this would just be more of the same. But even though I never lacked male attention when I was younger and thinner, now I'm faced with the reality that I am old, overweight and couldn't get a man to acknowledge me, much less desire me, if I paid them. In the 70's I distinctly felt that not wanting kids was what men wanted. And that was great because that's just how I felt. But now, I feel betrayed - like the joke was on me. I still believe I made the right decision not to have kids - but God, what a price I feel I've had to, and still do, pay. A woman going it alone is hard in their 30's & 40's but from my experience, the older a woman gets the more isolated and invisible she becomes. I can't even imagine what the next decades will bring.