Hi - firstly i feel for you cos i know what your going through - secondly i totally agree with the ladies postings here especially as they have given their personal account and you get my respect for that - in my 18 month experience i learnt straight away - i was rational she was and still is irrational, you will NEVER make her go to counselling she has to want to do that herself - like the last lady said i stood back and decided to go on the ride with her I showed strength and resolve, ot on with my life and she saw me racing away - basically she warmed back, i drew her back twice, she left got an apartment i helped all along the way, she came ack then went to her sisters, ive seen it all, the emotion, anxiety, been on meds them off them and yes someone else even though she never admitted any affair there was (as there usualy is) someone else but let me tell you they are only superficial it wont last as teh ladies say be positive stay focused on you and teh kids stay strong let her see you enjoying life and having fun and going it, its the relationship game, she will like a happy strong you not someone sat pining waiting - i recently let her move back in from her sisters as it was getting strained there and i moved out (i still want her to have time and space) - i couldn't face living in same house whilst separated so i moved to a mates for few weeks then im renting a little place near lighthouse which i can start to make nice - ive never resented her once through all this as i know it isnt her in there the chemical fog has descended - i'm also rational enough to know we may never reconnect, when we got back she said so many deep loving things so i kind of feel she is still searching - im comfortable with what im doing - i believe in fate so i see what tomorrow brings - you do the same and you will be better for it and i hope things work out for you
Regards
Stu UK