Everything you guys have said has given me much to think about. The one hope I have is that he won't do it.

This is so out of character for him. He has always been a really wonderful person. Works hard, we have a beautiful home and a few hundred acres on the river. I know he has not done this before. This is the only time in the years we have been together that he has been secretive, etc. I have always known where he is and what he is doing. I can't really say what he does, but he flies into a foreign country but is immediately taken to his office which is based on the ocean. Same process 5 to 8 weeks later - flown to foreign country where his flight intercepts and brings him home. He is always where he is supposed to be when I call his office, etc. Home for 3 weeks then he's gone again. Same routine over and over.

Before he left home this last time we had a big argument and he has never been angry at me before. I am hoping this is something that he got into his head for "spite" but won't really follow through. He is also at the age of midlife at which time many men do crazy things that are out of character.

I am not defending him, but I want to make it clear that he isn't some scummy sex pervert lurking in the alleys.

It's more like he's lost his mind.

Of course I'm terrified of catching some horrible disease - that's the biggest scare actually. The fact is I am also financially dependent on this man. But also, I would be so miserable without him. I don't know which is worse.

I appreciate you listening to me...it helps just to have someone to talk to about this.

AME