I am in, or maybe out, of a 13+ year relationship with a man I no longer know. As was stated by other writers, he began to become distant and uncommunicative over the last 6 months. He did not want to spend time with my family or grandchildren. He will be 54 this year. I recognized that he was very depressed, due to statements he had made. I finally convinced him to see a Therapist about his depression. The bomb dropped on June 18th, when he told me he hadn't been honest with me. He proceeded to tell me that he had been discussing our relationship with the Therapist, apparently not his depression and when asked what he was "getting" from the relationship, he couldn't answer. He said that he wants to begin our relationship over, dating and such, and that he cannot see a point when I wouldn't be in his life. We were planning on getting married and he is retiring this year. Doesn't want to, would rather continue working. We have two homes (a blessing in disguise), so I am now living in the other home and he has his "space", which he said he needed. I am a wreck. It seems like our relationship was an illusion to me now. Same as with the other writers, it seemed he changed overnight to someone selfish and caustic and uncaring. What to do? I did see a Therapist, but she said I was utilizing good coping skills and to continue to do so. I want answers, and there are none. I am focusing on myself now, not communicating with him other than e-mail, and now I don't even want to do that. I am hurt and angry and frustrated.