Our research into midlife crisis has convinced us that there's no such thing.
No one thing, anyway.
"Midlife crisis" is an umbrella term for what are really several different problems. One academic paper reported that "middle-aged Baby Boomers ... quite freely used the term “mid-life crisis” to describe nearly any setback, either in their career or family life, which they experienced."
This may be convenient, but it can cause problems. Advice appropriate to one type of midlife crisis can be wholly inappropriate for another. A better understanding of which type of midlife crisis you're concerned with will help you deal with it more effectively.
In our analysis, what people call "midlife crisis" can be one of four things. They are differentiated by:
1) Whether the problem is tied to or triggered by middle age or one's own aging and mortality; and
2) severity
Two choices for each gives us four types of "crisis." There is a fifth group -- people who experience no such thing. This table shows them all:
| Impact | ||||
| Severe | Mild | None | ||
| Tied to middle age and/or own aging/death? | yes | Type 1: Classic (age-related; severe) | Type 2: Assessment (age-related; mild) | Type 5: Smooth Sailing |
| no | Type 3: Depression? (not age; severe) | Type 4: Dealing With Life (not age; mild) | ||
Here's a synopsis of each type. In later sections of "Twenty Questions About Midlife Crisis" reference, we'll look at each in more detail.
Type 1: A Severe Crisis Triggered by One's Mortality
The first type is the classic form: a severe psychological crisis brought on by the realization that one's time is running out. At the farthest extreme it is very much like an existential crisis, where one may feel that their life is worthless. More common is deep unhappiness with one's life so far, and with where it is going.
What differentiates a severe from a mild reaction? People suffering either of the "severe" types of crisis (Types 1 and 3) have likely had significant psychological reactions at other significant points in their life -- for instance, the "quarter-life crisis." Among other factors feeding in to this predisposition: personality, brain chemistry, and even genetics.
Type 2: Knowing You've Got A Finite Amount of Time Triggers a Midlife Assessment, Not Crisis
It's not only possible to assess one's life and future without becoming clinically depressed, it's quite common. Recent research has shown that this is a normal process during midlife, and many argue that it should be embraced, not ignored. If the path you're on at midlife isn't the path you want to be on, why not change?
Type 3: A Severe Crisis, But Not Necessarily Related To Age or Mortality
The next two categories, while commonly called "midlife crises," are really "crises that happened in midlife." They could happen during any other stage of life too. The more severe form is major depression or other significant mental health incident. It could be triggered by a significant event such as divorce, loss of a job, the death of a parent or spouse, illness, financial problems, or some other significant setback or stress. Consider these symptoms:
Those, according to the National Institute for Mental Health, are symptoms of major depression, but they have significant overlap with with the popular idea of a midlife crisis.
The difference between the two types of severe midlife crisis is the cause. Is it the realization of one's mortality? Or a significant setback or other problem?
Type 4: A Less Severe Reaction to Important Events or Stresses
The last of the four main categories is a less severe version of the last type. One of those major life events or some other source of stress causes problems such as grief, self-doubt, a perceived loss of direction, or some other unusual feelings. While disruptive, thought, they are not immobilizing. People are frequently equipped to deal with these problems, either on their own or with support from spouse, family, and friends.
Type 5: Smooth Sailing
Some number of people won't experience anything that could be described as a midlife crises. They may be the type of person who constantly makes mid-course adjustments to their life's trajectory, or has never had a setback that challenged their beliefs about themselves, is very self-aware, is able to handle life's surprises better than most, or is happy in all important parts of their life. Whatever the cause, they never have the period of questioning or turmoil that characterizes the four types of midlife crisis above.
Sometimes It's "None of the Above"
A final type of midlife crisis isn't shown on our table because it isn't really a crisis -- it's an excuse. The popular belief that practically everyone goes through a psychological trauma at midlife, and that the crisis causes behavior ranging from silly purchases to thrill seeking and infidelity, provides cover for people who want to do those things anyway. One only has to read online or offline advice columns to see how frequently this rationale is used -- often by the wife of a man who's learned that it's easy to blame his "midlife crisis" for his transgressions. Digging deeper may reveal what's really going on.
More Detail Forthcoming
We're going to go into more detail in this white paper (Twenty Questions About Midlife Crisis). In the meantime, peruse some of the other articles we've posted there or in our "midlife crisis" category.
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Sources (Partial):
National Institute for Mental Health
Aldwin CM, Levenson MR. 2001. Stress, coping, and health at midlife: a developmental perspective