I'll cut right to the chase: I think my parents taught me that love is putting up with a lot of ill treatment and staying no matter what.

My own notion of love was that it would be like having a best friend and lover for the rest of my life, and we would have little problems but we'd adjust. »more»

My MLC got me searching for the deeper meanings of life. I'm putting this construct forth as my opinion because it might not look meaningful to you but I think it might help some people.

Why does a spouse cheat? Why do we want to find lovers in real life or online, and get that excitement? Why do we worry and fret about aging? All of this when we know better. »more»

I don't know how to approach this whole question, but I know I have to put my best possible foot forward and make positive change, not negative, because I don't have the right to thoughtlessly crash my way through this. I love everyone involved. Furthermore, I believe that the way I treat others is the proof of who I am. I want to prove I can change in a mature way. »more»

According to recent studies on midlife and happiness, the years from 40 to 50 are often the unhappiest. If you can make it to 60 it's relatively easy to feel good about life again. Is that true for you? »more»

I've decided to try for a healthier marriage rather than an affair or walking away, to ease the pain I feel over how my life has turned out. Why? Because of the potential rewards to be found in working out problems instead of tossing them out the door. I think there must be a baby in that basin of dirty bathwater. After all, who else would know you and work with you when you're old? »more»

The stories I see here, of leaving and upheaval motivated by desperation and pain, are all familiar to me because I feel like leaving too. As a wife I feel I've had to shut up to make room for my husband to rule, or else have a household of fighting. This conciliatory, martyrish way I've lived just can't work anymore. My husband is a workaholic and can't change, while I'm dying to change. »more»

This crisis I've been in has forced me to take a good hard look at things. »more»

If you haven't done many thrilling things in your life, and then it's time to die, are you a failure? »more»

Going through my midlife crisis, one of the things that's changed for me is music. I had to dump a lot of old things from my Ipod list because they were getting me down. Example: Elton John music. I loved his classic playlist all my life. I loved "Don't let the Sun Go Down On Me" so much, I'd sing it in the grocery store. Now? »more»

Other women who've been working since they were twenty will now have retirement income. Not me. I stayed home. I got the joy of watching every step of my children's infancy and childhood. Now I'm stuck with just me.

As I make my way out into the sunshine, I sure would love to hear what other people have to say about being "just a homemaker" and what happens next.

I'm a habitual Self Help reader. Whenever I have a crisis, big or small, I turn to gurus who have written books. I love Gary Zukav for his words about aligning your intention with your choices as a way of achieving authentic living. and I love Deepak Chopra for giving us the substance of mysterious things like death and the secrets of life. »more»