I’m amazed at the number of accomplished, assertive, confident midlife women who confide in me a problem with the their dating relationship. The common sense solution is to talk to their guy about it.

However, many of these women seem squeamish at this prospect. When I ask why, they respond, “I’m afraid of losing him.” »more»

It can be hot, steamy and mouth watering. With a great recipe and tasty condiments, it can be delectable.

But just as with the first waffle, the first time with a new love can also be anemic and unsatisfying. In fact, many midlife daters report the initial romp to be less fulfilling than they hoped. Even with someone with whom they are emotionally and physically excited. »more»

An Adventures in Delicious Dating After 40 reader writes:

I’ve been dating my 56-year-old boyfriend for a six months. I enjoy his company, both in and out of the bedroom, and he says he enjoys mine too. In the beginning, we’d go out to dinner, plays, concerts, movies, picnics, bike rides, etc. Now, he says he has to work late and comes over just to spend the night — including pre-sleep activities, if you know what I mean.

I want a boyfriend, not a booty call. »more»

You’ve been dating for a while. You’ve had lots of first dates that didn’t evolve to seconds. So your dating numbers seem high to those who’ve been out of the dating scene for years. To them any number over 10 seems outrageous if you exclude anything before age 30. »more»

“Recovery time” is however long it takes one to return to normal after an event. Whether it’s the time it takes an athlete’s body to return to normal heart rate or hydration after a grueling event, or someone’s return to health after a setback. Or how long it takes for someone to recover after a relationship’s ending. »more»

DG reader Carol asks: »more»

When in Singapore in January, I learned about a Chinese legend that is supposed to help you attract love. It’s pretty simple.

In Chinatown, a friend pointed out two Mandarin duck figurines. She said if you put these little statues in your bedroom so they faced each other bill-to-bill, they would attract love to you.

Why? »more»

For a relationship to work long term, I believe it’s important that you are able to fit into each other’s world. Not that you have to live parallel lives with the same profession, income, hobbies, etc.

But is important that you can easily slip into each other’s activities, gracefully converse with the other’s counterparts and dress appropriately for the occasion. »more»

Men have told me it isn’t fair when a women judges them based on behaviors of previous suitors. Ideally we all want to be assessed as individuals, not lumped into “men do this” or “women do that” stereotypes.

Yet it is difficult to not take into account past lessons from collective experiences with the opposite gender. »more»

When you talk to a potential suitor regularly for more than a few weeks before meeting, a false sense of intimacy can develop. In flirty or soul-baring emails and/or phone conversations, you can begin to feel a budding emotional connection to the other. »more»

A few weeks ago on “Private Practice” two colleagues decided to take their sexual chemistry to the “friends with benefits” level. However, when in the bedroom ready to commence, she couldn’t go through with it, claiming that sex together would cheapen their relationship.

She exclaims, “I’m not just some girl you met on the Internet.” »more»

When friends learn I have sometimes dated multiple men simultaneously, they ask how I am able to do so. »more»

His smile ignites you. His touch sends currents up your spine. His kiss jolts you like you’ve been jump-started.

We dream — nay, fantasize — about this kind of sexual energy. »more»

Yesterday, Price Considerate shared that in a moment of candor one of his mentees disclosed he was first put off by PC, in part because that day PC’s shoes didn’t match his pants. PC explained to him that sometimes he doesn’t pay as much attention to those details as he should, but he didn’t get defensive. »more»

Maybe you’re like me and have attended a lot of seminars. Perhaps some of these have been personal-growth workshops. After taking a bunch of them, you realize you can design a lot of the activite yourself. If you are a good student, you see that you don’t really need someone else to design the processes and led you through them. You can do this for yourself. »more»

An alert reader sent a link to this article, “Sex, Lust And Passion Top Baby Boomer Love Expectations” for us to mull over. »more»

You had an instant, magical, mutual connection. On the first date you both expressed how attracted you were to the other, and how much you enjoyed your time together. He kissed you on the cheek during dinner, showing that he was a gentleman — not assuming privileges too soon. »more»

Today would have been my twenty-second wedding anniversary. I think it is important to reminisce about long-term relationships gone awry as one would at a memorial of a difficult person. Not dwell on the downs, but the ups. Paint a picture of what was added to your life as a result, not what was stripped. »more»

A friend asked me how I managed to stay so happy. It’s true that generally I’m a perpetually perky person, but I do have my bouts with unhappiness when faced with setbacks and disappointments. lemonadeI’ve worked hard to reduce the time I spend in a dreary mood when something unpleasant happens. Or if something I’d looked forward to doesn’t materialize. »more»

When dating someone with whom you’ve become enamored, it is easy to project your life into the future. You imagine being intertwined every blissful day, moving in together, perhaps getting married. In this fantasy is embedded perpetual elation, constant joy, unbridled happiness. »more»

A review of "Keys to the Kingdom" by Alison Armstrong.

Alison Armstrong began her study of what makes men tick in 1991 and her staff gives “Celebrating Men, Satisfying Women®” workshops around the country. Her focus is on creating peace and partnership between men and women.

She shares some of her findings in her novel, "Keys to the Kingdom." »more»

Wouldn’t it be great if there were rules for responsible dating, just as there are rules for responsible driving? I realize not everyone abides to responsible driving guidelines, but at least some have been publicized so more people do than if nothing had been created.

So how about we craft some rules for responsible dating? Let me begin, and you can add what I leave out: »more»

In many online profiles, both genders say they want a mate who possess a good sense of humor. But what really does that mean? For many, it means the man makes a funny (or almost funny) comment and the woman laughs.

But what if the woman is the funny (or funnier) one? »more»

I may have led you astray.

In “You are (probably) more attractive than you think you are!”, I based my comments on the observation that most midlife women I know think of themselves as less attractive than others rate them. And men tend to overstate their attractiveness.

But a study reported in “Freakonomics: A Rogue Economist Explores the Hidden Side of Everything” sets my premise on its ear. »more»

No doubt you’ve heard of the study released a few days ago from University of Texas at Austin psychology researchers David Buss, Ph.D. and Cindy Meston, Ph.D. on why human beings have sex.

However, upon closer examination, I see that the study was based mostly on undergraduate students (1500 of the 1900 subjects were students; approx. 400 were from a separate study of men and women aged 17-52). It doesn’t take a genius to deduce that college students have sex for reasons that, hopefully, don’t exactly parallel people over 40. »more»